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Dear Diary

There’s really nothing I can do,

But to simply say this right out to you,

That I always wonder where you are,

What you are doing,

And with whom you are spending your time.

I wonder if you ever stare,

At the same night sky as I

Wishing one day you and I might,

Have one more chance to set things right.

The things I would tell you,

The secrets I would let you into.

I’d let myself be defenseless

Even more so than when I first met you.

So one day, if and when, my wish would come true,

That God would bless me enough to find and see you,

I will not waste a moment,

To right all of my wrong,

And fall in your arms,

where I know I belong.

The friendship we once had,

Became something of a long shot.

I can’t bear to lose you again,

‘Cause if I do,

My misery would never end.

So with this I will pour my heart to you,

Even if my only wish might not come true.

This risk I will make,

As I hope for you to know,

I have, and I always will love you,

Till the last breath I take.

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Death Is a Blessing

Life is difficult. For everyone.

Although at times there are ups that we experience, in all, life is mostly dominated by hardships and problems that often recur.

Over the past few years, I have slowly been converted from being an optimist to becoming a pessimist. Not that such mentality is a terrible way of thinking, but that to me, I view pessimism as closely resembling reality.

When Adam and Eve were in God’s paradise, life was pure sweetness and bliss. However, when they consumed the forbidden fruit, life turned sour. People were punished, and hence why we suffer most of our breathing moments.

To me, death is a prize awaiting all of us. Because by then, we’ll finally and truly reunite with God. Not that it’s impossible to do so while being alive, but that when we are dead, we are no longer distracted and restricted by the earthly things that keep us apart from Him.

But that’s just me…

What do you think?

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Love Blurb

Everyone loves, and everyone desires to be loved.

But finding love isn’t easy to find. And so is letting go of people who you have, and will always, continue to love.

There was once upon a time when I stumbled across a quote (from somewhere I can’t recall) and it left a significant impression on me that it forever changed my opinion on love…

“The truth is that you never get over people. Your life goes on but there’s always a part of you that loves them and yearns for them, wishing that you got it right the first time.“

Soon after, I delved deeply into how my mentality with relationships influenced my social behaviours. I examined my current life situation and began to realize the changes the people I truly care(d) about caused at one time or another…

But as we all know, in life, people come and go. Babies are born, and the elderly/sick dies. It’s a natural cycle. As humans, we’re powerless.

And we’re also powerless when it comes to love. We can’t control who we fall in love with, no matter how hard we try. The heart and mind are two separate entities that often tug and pull at one another. Most often, when the mind advises for us to move on, the heart often disagrees and yells out to stay.

And that’s how humans operate.

Our mindsets simply get accustomed to the idea that we are forced to be apart from the one who we love, whether because they are called upon by God to Heaven…or whether they simply reject your offer of love.

But deep inside of us is a permanent tattoo of those who we love— in our minds, in our souls, and in our hearts. They, in one shape of form or another, have left their marks upon ourselves and helped us carve a path in the journey of life.

The ones we love caused us to learn, both about them and ourselves and the society in which we live.

They’ve helped us mold our mentalities and behaviours accordingly, to prepare ourselves in handling different situations later in life.

They’ve helped us learn about love, and the wonderful and amazing things it can bring to us.

Those people have taught us the true value of love.

As I often find myself imagining how situations could be different from what they are now if I had only done this one thing and not that other, I suddenly realize how important you are, and forever will be, to me.

You have become an essential part of me, no matter if for better or for worse,

knowing that our lives crossing each other’s paths is meant to be

as designated by fate and faith…

My realization of your importance is a miracle on its own, as my confession of love for you represents my undying allegiance to you.

Although you have kindly (and rightly so) refused, nevertheless shall I stay

to wait for you if you return.

But for now, as people tell me to “get over you,” just know that I will hold on and always love you.

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A Refugee’s Story…

Imagine yourself without a home. Even just for a minute. Without shelter, and the necessities that come with it: food, water, medicine, clothing…family.

To millions of refugees worldwide, being without a home is an everyday reality.

At this time, you may be wondering why this refugee-related post made its appearance in my blog, where entertainment seems to be the core theme of my site. I, however, wholeheartedly guarantee to my readers that this article no way maintains the purpose to bore you with facts and sad stories. Rather, it aims to portray the way my passion for the safety of refugees directs my overall life goal: to hold a profession at the UNHCR, where I can simultaneously ensure earning a means of living and the farewell of refugees.

School in a Refugee Camp in Africa

Indeed, refugees are people who are less fortunate than most. By the end of 2008, the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees (UNHCR) estimated that the global refugee population ranged over 42 million people (16 million were refugees and 26 million were internally displaced persons aka IDP). Since then, more families and individuals are continually being displaced out of their homes, due either to natural disasters or political, racial, or group-related conflicts. Some seek refuge in UNHCR camps established near their own homes where they receive temporary aid. However, a majority are displaced thousands of miles away from their countries of origin with little to no hope of returning.

And those who remain in the camps sites since their arrival contribute to the overcrowding of UNHCR refugee centers, as new incoming refugees continue to arrive daily from conflict-ridden nations worldwide. To this day, the UNHCR along with donor nations (the US, UK, Japan, France and others) are finding the task of providing basic human necessities for refugees and IDPs more difficult especially when wars, discrimination, economic downfalls and the effects of past natural disasters dominate today’s societies.  Furthermore, the UNHCR’s annual budgets are too limited that operations are executed without achieving the designated full desired mandates (for 2010-2011, the target budget is $ 3.1 billion, the agency currently maintains $1.4 billion).

With such obstacles still to overcome, UNHCR shelters often resemble tents, restrooms are shared by hundreds, and the physical and medical safety of the refugees are consistently endangered by rebel groups, perpetrating terrorist governments and diseases. At times, a mere several acres houses several thousand refugees in shambles where they are exposed to harsh weather and intense drought.

However, the hardships these refugees and IDPs face do not merely lie upon basic human needs. Rather, the emotional distresses and the separation from families are also critical aspects the international community attempts to address when confronted with the deteriorating refugee conditions. Although some may fully believe that such cases are rare, it is, however, quite common.

Refugees as far from their families in Senegal are transported to Cuba, and even some Iraqi refugees now live in the United States. Worldwide relocations of refugees without their families is a popular trend in the international community, as such practice provides efficient utilization of available resources each member country of the United Nations (UN) can offer. Typically, an individual who relocates without his/her family may more likely be successful to integrate in the society he/she currently resides than those who relocate along with his/her family, as families often strongly prioritize grouping together, upholding old traditions and thereby rejecting any new unfamiliar outside influences.

And as all of us are (and should be) aware, wars undyingly wage on. As a result, refugees are unable to return to their motherlands. With the refugee population continuing to grow, the UNHCR is burdened with the task of caring for these individuals, while operating on a meager budget and limited technical, expertise and personnel resources.

You and I can make a difference to the misfortunes of refugees and IDPs, without donating millions of dollars like governments and some private firms do. Simply volunteer at  a local governmental agency affiliated with UNHCR, or even apply for an internship to the UNHCR (http://www.unhcr.org/cgi-bin/texis/vtx/internship).

Or you can simply continue to stay informed about the plight of refugees and IDPs, and consider this blog refugee-post of mine the beginning of a life-changing journey for you and for future generations…

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PS.

This is dedicated to people who I know share my passion about refugees: Rebecca Francois and Anna Frechette.

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“LADY GAGA: POP-FASHION-FAME MONSTER” Part 2 of 2

There’s no doubt that Lady Gaga is famous. There’s no second thoughts as to how much influence she has had on pop music, fashion, and the way teenagers today think. When Lady Gaga first broke into the scene, she was accused of imitating Gwen Stefani, Christina Aguilera, and Katy Perry. Now, everything is vice versa. Christina Aguilera and Katy Perry are accused of copying Lady Gaga.

From the last post, we begged the question of whether Gaga’s consistent shocking performances and behaviours would continue to sustain her fame in the future. If not, should she quickly abandon the outrageous outfits and dress quite normally just like the rest of us (which in Lady Gaga’s case would be shocking after all)?

No one knows. However, one thing is certain: Lady Gaga is and will remain unpredictable.

In her performance at Canada’s 2009′s Much Music Video Awards (MMVA), Lady Gaga sported a pyrotechnic-firing metallic bra while singing a medley of “Love Game” and “Poker Face,” which caused headlining news the next few days. Two months later, she repeated her phenomenon at the MTV Video Music Awards (VMA) where she shocked the audience with a bloody, and suicidal number of “Paparazzi” (you can hear the collective gasp!).

As it surely is possible to assume that Gaga’s performances and shows are executed mainly for entertainment values, however, it is immature to quickly dismiss the singer as shallow, garbage and vocally untalented. She is, after all, a singer/performer, who not only sings well during her live performances, but she is also a marketing genius when selling her products (Dr. Dre’s Heartbeats, THE FAME, THE FAME MONSTER, etc).

However, when Lady Gaga’s name is mentioned, the first association that quickly comes to mind are her outrageous outfits, followed by her music videos which typically represent issues unrelated to the songs.

“Paparazzi,” for example, became the turning point in which Gaga’s career and songs began to tamper with social issues. As in the video, the once cheeky and colorful Gaga inverted into the “Mother Monster” we now know– someone who is filled with contempt and purpose rather than an obsession with fame and glory, of which Gaga championed early from “THE FAME.”

Then in 2010, she released “Telephone” in which she satirizes the oblivion the American society faces from the deathly servings of the media and the monopolies of fast food chains… which in no way is related to the song’s lyrical content of Gaga not wanting someone to call her anymore.

Then comes her most controversial video yet: “Alejandro.” The 8-minute video encompasses 3 related monstrous social and religious issues, of which even the United States government has long held traditional conservative views. ”Alejandro” encompasses religious blasphemy (Gaga swallowing a rosary while wearing a rubber nun suit) and military traditionalism (soldiers performing violence on civilians in blind obedience).

However, the overarching social issue the video takes pride on is the artistic expression of the gay community and its liberation from the reins of suppression, which Gaga portrays as muscular men wearing outfits that highly contradicts the idea of masculinity (they wore black bikinis, thigh nets and heels). With the gay issue as the core theme, Lady Gaga spotlights the difficulty gay men and women face in the military world and when attempting to find social acceptance while upholding religious values. Only time will tell if “Alejandro” will have an effect on changing the society’s minds now and forever.

But as we all know, all things must come to an end.

With the busiest season for fresh new music just around the corner (fall, winter), pop charts worldwide can turn upside down one more time. As pop/country sensation Taylor Swift releases her new lead single “Mine” off of upcoming third album “SPEAK NOW” (released on October 25th), and with Katy Perry releasing “TEENAGE DREAMS” with lead single “California Gurls” on August 24th, Gaga is in for a major overhaul.

What will Gaga do to sustain her fame? What type of behavior will Lady Gaga next project to us? Will she continue the alter ego of “Lady Gaga,” or will she revert to her old self as Stefani Germanotta and grace the world with 70′s rock ‘n roll ballads as in the song “You And I” in her upcoming third album in 2011 speculated to be named “BORN THIS WAY” (YEEEEYYYYY!!!!)?

Or will she suddenly take the screenplay world by a storm as she did with the music scene…?

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“LADY GAGA: POP-FASHION-FAME MONSTER” Part 1 of 2

Since 2008, Lady Gaga has taken over the radio airwaves, magazines, televisions, fashion venues, concert halls, advertisements, promotions, jobs and anything you could think of that cross people’s everyday lives.

Yes, it’s only been 2.5 years since she first appeared as her own independent act in the pop radar scene with her first smash hit single “Just Dance.” Afterwards, she churned out “Poker Face” which helped her earn her second #1 single worldwide, and let’s not forget a grammy win in the Best Dance Recording category. Next came her disco-stick bearing “Love Game,” followed by the stalker-themed “Paparazzi,” which not only helped propel her to the top of the charts, but also to the hearts of billions of people worldwide.

And those four singles were all just from her debut album “THE FAME,” which appropriately earned her massive fame and another grammy in the Best Electronic/Dance Album category.

BUT, Ms. Gaga did not stop there.

On November 24, 2009 (a little over a year later after THE FAME was released back in August 19, 2008), Lady Gaga provided the world with “THE FAME MONSTER,” which is the yin to the yang of her first album.

On this second album, Lady Gaga introduced to the masses the concept of fame’s dark sides. Songs like “Bad Romance,” ”Telephone,” and ”Alejandro” all represented fears/monsters Gaga experienced while on her way to stardom. The direction of her visual projection of glamorous and colorful enjoyable fame-oriented life on the first disc suddenly turned to the south, as her music videos began to include morbid and foreboding elements that provoked criticisms and praises alike.

With a brilliant strategy highly contradictory to today’s pop standards of mundane performances, Lady Gaga re-energized the pop climate through her ever-changing artistic direction both musically and visually in music videos, which all have each garnered over millions of views on YouTube. Even at one time, “Bad Romance” became the most watched video shortly after its release on the site. Gaga’s rise to stardom continued stronger, that she herself became what her minions Little Monsters call “Mother Monster.”

With Mother Monster becoming more prominent (or more annoying to other people’s perspectives) in today’s environment, Lady Gaga continues to perform the unexpected and push boundaries most contemporary artists are hesitant to disturb. Her latest videos often involve controversial concepts and scenes that do not coincide with the lyrical contents of the songs she promotes at the time. Most recently, the video for “Alejandro” metaphorically morphed issues as gay rights, religion and militarism all into one without regard to potential backlash to her career or personal reputation.

Aside from her record-breaking songs and videos, Lady Gaga also possesses another asset that helps maintain her relevance in today’s world. Arguably, Gaga’s popularity highly revolves around her costumes, her eccentric fashion sense and outrageous behaviour. She’s often (at least lately) seen parading in a rhinestone-studded disco bra with matching underwear and nothing else. With unique shades, hairdo and hats every time she steps out, even companies as Polaroid scrambled to hire her to be their artistic director.

And as such, Lady Gaga feeds on the capitalistic opportunities her level of fame currently offers. The fame monster herself has been touring nonstop in sold-out shows worldwide. Little monsters everywhere hastily consume Monster Ball tickets the moment they become available for purchase, that Gaga’s tour now extends until mid-2011 to provide chances for everyone to witness her spectacular shows. As a result of her pure success, Lady Gaga is the most demanded pop artist of today, and Time Magazine recognized her relevance that she was named as one of 2010′s TIME Magazine’s 100 Most Influential People worldwide.

But will her fame, shock factor, success and out-of-this-world art performances continue to wow audiences throughout?

To be continued…

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Toy Story 3 and Me

This past weekend, I jumped on the bandwagon and watched Pixar’s “Toy Story 3” in the theatres. Along with two friends (Catherine Asistores and Kevin Yan), we watched what could be 2010′s best movie of the year. And by the fact that the movie theatre wasn’t packed, we knew we’re one of the late people who did not watch the movie when it first premiered.

Another confession: I also haven’t seen Toy Story 1 nor 2. Yea, I haven’t.

But this is about the third installment of the amazing trilogy, and I’m super glad that I decided to break the streak of me not watching the series and go to a movie theatre to see it. Because I can honestly say that by watching the movie, I saw myself in one of the character’s shoes playing with his toys from way back when.

Yes, that character would be Andy- the one who owns Woody, Buzz, Jessie, Rex, etc. And as you all know, Andy was the 18 year old boy/man who was about to head to college the Friday of the week the movie supposedly took place. I’m also assuming that Andy is going to attend Florida State University.

As one of the plots for the movie, Andy’s upcoming college years meant that his toys must be left behind.

From that plot, I realized the true extent in which my life is becoming. I am growing up, maturing to be a man to whom people will depend on- whether as a co-worker, friend, uncle or “father.” I realized that my childhood is and has been drifting away from my grasp for some time now. It is time for me to finally let go.

As my childhood drifts away, I surely will miss it. The days in which I had no worries except what games to play and what cartoon show to watch are no longer my priorities. Now, I must sustain a way of living, maintain exceptional grades in my courses and try to carve a path for me in the political world. Within a year in college, I didn’t know that life for me will be more difficult than I’ve ever known.

But one way or another, I must face life under God’s guidance.

And so will you.